I grew up with a group of friends and we were inseparable. It started out with two of us in kindergarten, then it grew to 3 by 1st grade, and by the time we reached middle school, there were 6 of us. All of our classmates knew we were a group and that was that. We were borderline inseparable, one of us couldn’t be without the other. We spent almost every Friday night at one of our houses, staying up way too late, making weird videos, or having Nerf gun wars.
High School came along and we weren’t as close as we used to be. Cheer, dance, and soccer became their first priorities, sleepovers slowed down, and the way we appeared to everyone else became more important that nurturing our friendships. Popularity became quite a factor and relationships started to tear us apart. We all started to drift away by the time graduation came and I can count on one hand the amount of times we’ve all been together since 2013. I think back on our friendship fondly, but for reasons we have yet to find, we’ve all gone in different directions.
All that being said, by my second semester of college, friends weren’t really a thing. I had just dropped out, I was a bit embarrassed by it, and I closed myself off from a lot of things and a lot of people. Flash forward 3 years later and I had 3 people that I had actually called my friends. And even then I wasn’t sure they even liked me enough to say the same thing about me. I remember at the end of last summer and into fall, how hard I prayed for the Lord to send me friends. I prayed for friends that were ready to do life together, point each other to the Lord, and for them to just be there. I remember asking Him to open up my heart to be willing to be friends with others, to start being the kind of friend that I wanted to have.
Y’all, the Lord hears our prayers and provides. I look back on this year and get overwhelmed with the amount of genuine friends I have; ones that only the Lord could’ve blessed me with. Some of them I’ve been going to church with for years but never spoke to, some have grown up in the same town as me but our paths never crossed, some have become friends because they’ve married other friends, some I’ve just met and we were instant friends, but all of them are real and true friends. And I thank God every day that He placed them in my life.
There is a lot of beauty in genuine friendship. Genuine friends will be the ones that you can turn to in any situation. Genuine friends will be the ones to call you out when you’re wrong. Genuine friends will be the ones that will run to be by your side in the hardest parts of life. Genuine friends will be the ones that you can call and just sit in silence on the phone while they figure out life. Genuine friends will be the ones to point you to Christ in all things.
And praise the Lord that He has given me genuine friends! Praise the Lord that He has blessed me with people to hold me accountable in all things! Y’all, we aren’t called to do life alone. We’re called to be in a community of believers, living life for the glory of God in all things. I see a lot of people my age and younger going through friends faster than the speed of light. They’re “besties” one week and the next they’re at each others throats for looking at the other the wrong way. Here’s the thing we forget when making friends: we aren’t going to agree on every little thing in life. We aren’t always going to like what the other person says or does and vice versa. We aren’t always going to want the same things as the other. In fact, you’re probably going to have a better friendship if you aren’t the same in everything.
Y’all, I know how lonely it can be when we shut ourselves off and keep everyone out. I know how cold hearted we can become after we’ve been alone for so long. But y’all, there is so much life and beauty that comes from friendships. There is so much joy and purpose in going through life with others by your side. If you’re struggling with finding real friends, start praying that the Lord not only opens others eyes and hearts, but yours as well. We’re not meant to be alone y’all, I’m praying for anyone and everyone of you to find joy in the friendships you have and to be open and love others that come your way.
“Iron sharpen iron, and one man sharpens another.”
Proverbs 27:17 ESV
Beauty in the Ashes 